Lashing Out

The Split Second-In Consideration of Others in These Trying Times

I thank all of you who have been so supportive as I try to get support for my unpublished book The Split Second:  In Consideration of Others or Look Up from the Phone and How to Deal with Rudeness in Others. As of this writing, I can state that there is a little bit of hope right now for success; however, I want to stress that it is a little hope. As some of us might say, “some is better than none.” I think I should leave that one for right now. I just wish I could hear something back. There are those who think, as I do not want to self-publish, that books are published all the time by any author who wants one to be published. Believe me, not so.

I was reminded yesterday of the times I have seen people “lash out” at those who are restaurant staff members, store clerks, and other personnel who deal with the public at large. I am so glad that I learned the wonderful Miss Manners lesson: there is no excuse for rudeness anytime, anywhere. I agree with this valuable notion completely. Am I going to be rude to people at some time in my life as I “go out into the world?” Yes, I am not perfect. But when I yell at someone who is trying to “take care of me or my needs at the moment,” I must stop for a moment, take a deep breath, and then remember to apologize for my bad behavior I remember once when I was in Charlotte, North Carolina on a flight stopover to New York City about 12 years ago. The flight to NYC was late, and then we received word that all flights to the three airports were canceled for the rest of the day because of heavy storms in the New York City area. Those of us who were “stuck” in Charlotte were told to report to the Customer Service Desk to be given hotel accommodations for the night and then be rebooked for a flight to NYC the next day. No one likes being in such a position. When I was standing at the counter being taken care of by an airline staff member, the gentleman next to me was yelling quite loudly at the employee in front of him. He felt the call to cancel any further flights for the day was wrong. It was uncomfortable for everyone around him. Finally, I turned to him and said, “Sir, she (the employee behind the counter) did not make the call to cancel flights.” I felt I was taking a risk as he might start yelling at me. However, he “backed down” and then, calmed down. When he left, the nice lady who was dealing with this ungrateful passenger thanked me profusely. I stated that he was making me very uncomfortable.

The Split Second states that whatever situation we may be in that is anything like a canceled flight provides no excuse to “lash out” at people and make an uncomfortable situation that much worse. On that day eleven years ago, we were not going anywhere close to New York City on that particular day. Yelling at employees who are trying to take care of us the best way they know how will not solve a situation and acting in such a way makes people uncomfortable as well as making the situation worse, I think. The Split Second states that we should think for a moment before we engage in such behavior.